Hagioscope

Thursday, August 14, 2008

get cracking!

For all you Wallace & Gromit lovers out there: Hulu.com has added 10 short films featuring mad inventor Wallace's Cracking Contraptions. Enjoy!

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Sunday, August 10, 2008

the movies are coming to me

My stomping grounds may soon experience a brush with fame. According to this article, famous once-local filmmakers the Coen brothers will be shooting footage in my area next month. The location mentioned in the article is not exactly in my neighborhood, but it's close enough I could stop by on my bike.

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Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Sloth Day: partial success

Yesterday’s attempt at a Day of Sloth was only partially successful. I ended up having some work tasks to do after all. But I did manage to hang out at a bookstore and see a couple matinees before the work and enjoy reading after the work. So it was good.

So what did I think of the much-hyped Dark Knight? Mixed reaction. The Batman character doesn't do much for me: all dark and broody, period. The movie was very true to the comic book character as far as I know, not being a comic reader, so I guess it gets an A for accuracy. But the unrelenting dreariness gets, frankly, boring.

The Harvey Dent character had some interesting dimension, though. He set up the moral dilemma nicely. And the Joker was just plain scary. True insanity, true unpredictability, is truly terrifying. Well played by the late Heath Ledger. (And no, I still haven’t seen Brokeback Mountain. Why? Because I knew gay men existed as Real Live Human Beings even before the movie came out. [Came out—get it?])

Action and gadgets: also okay, but the action editing was too MTV-choppy for me to follow much of it. But Batman fights dirty. I like that in a dark knight. Sadly, we didn’t get to see much gadgetry. Too busy racing from one apocalypse to the next.

And speaking of all those apocalypses, the movie is about half an hour too long. Just a few emergencies, more fully realized, would have been more interesting to me.

And I HATED the way women were portrayed in this movie. HATED. There were only three of them in a cast of thousands, with about 12 seconds of screen time apiece, and they were all blubbering victims. Not cool. At all. This is the 21st century, for crying out loud. If we can handle gay cowboys, I think we’re almost ready for women with spines.

On screen Maggie Gyllenhaal, the normally gorgeous actress who played Rachel, looked awful, as though something had been sucking out her soul. Probably the hypocrisy of pretending this was a good role.

All things considered, Kung Fu Panda kicked Dark Knight's hiney. The story was easier to follow and the hero was much more inspiring—something ordinary people could actually aspire to be. Cinematically, KFP was the opposite of DK: bright and beautiful and hopeful.

I’ll buy KFP and watch it several times more, maybe with my niece. We’ll talk about how anyone can become a hero by using her own special talents, like Master Tigress and Master Viper—neither of whom sheds a single tear in the process of fighting evil and helping her friends. And we’ll dance to the soundtrack.

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Sunday, April 13, 2008

hulu's on first

Q: It's the 21st century. Where's my online, on-demand streaming video?
A: Check out Hulu.com.

Q: What's on there? Anything good?
A: A little bit of everything—TV shows ranging from The Alfred Hitchcock Hour and Emergency! to Numb3rs and The Office. There's about 100 movies, too, including Monty Python's Meaning of Life.

Q: Really! Is it free?
A: Yes.

Q: Are there commercials? Cuz you know how I hate commercials.
A: Yes, there are a commercials, but far fewer than on broadcast TV, and you can still mute them.

Q: OK, but how's the video quality? Better than YouTube or worse than YouTube?
A: Hulu is better than YouTube like Picard is better than Kirk: Crisper, clearer, more mature, higher-tech, and with a lot less drunken debauchery.

Q: Er ... Do I need special hardware or software?
A: Nope, just a high-speed Internet connection.

Q: Not bad! Is there anything else cool about Hulu?
A: You can subscribe to RSS feeds that let you know when a new episode or clip from your favorite show has been posted.

Q: But only if you're a huge geek, right?
A: Yes, that is correct.

Q: Wow. Free, low-commercial TV and movies on demand. Aren't you grateful this service finally exists?
A: You betcha.

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Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Allen wrench

GAAAAAH! I'm watching a Woody Allen movie (Scoop) and enjoying it — except for the parts in which Woody Allen appears. I can't STAND the guy's "acting"! It's ruining an otherwise decent film.

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Sunday, August 26, 2007

ho on the range

While browsing the DVDs at Target today, I noticed a copy of Garrison Keillor's NPR show-cum-mockumentary A Prairie Home Companion for sale. However, the shelf tag wasn't long enough to display the whole title, so it had been abbreviated simply to A Prairie Ho.

Um, did Target just call Garrison Keillor a ho?

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Tuesday, May 22, 2007

hot fuzz

One of the great pleasures of my current lifestyle is that I can dash off to a matinee on a weekday if I feel like it, so yesterday, I did. And one of the great pleasures of seeing a matinee, other than devouring a smuggled-in sandwich in the dark, is seeing a movie that is a complete delight.

Hot Fuzz is such a movie. It's sort of Lethal Weapon meets an Agatha Christie mystery, and it's just about the best thing I've seen all year. Buddy cop action (and inaction), a quaint English village, an ex-James Bond, a hedgehog, some spectacular gore — Hot Fuzz has it all. And be forewarned, no cliche escapes unscathed. All 8 people in the theater guffawed out loud numerous times.

Star Simon Pegg may just be my second-favorite British actor (after new 007 Daniel Craig). This movie was worth more than the price of admission — something I don't believe I've ever said before — and I will buy it as soon as it comes out on DVD. Can't wait for the extras.

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Sunday, March 04, 2007

Guest star dims

I never thought I'd have to say this, but Christopher Guest has disappointed me. I just watched For Your Consideration, and it was . . . well, DULL. And I think that's because it was a very Hollywood movie — a picture by, for, and about Tinseltown. Oy! Even Fred Willard wasn't that funny. He was trying way, way too hard.

Heck, they all were. The Guest gang has been doing the same unscripted comedy together for so long, all their characters have become predictable. The improv isn't improv any more, it's just the same schtick they did in the last movie, or the one before that. Like the part where Willard spouts non sequiturs, or where a hopeful suitor hits on an oblivious Jennifer Coolidge, or where Eugene Levy is clueless, or where Parker Posey is just this side of normal. It's all the same. Not even the needless introduction of Ricky Gervais into the mix helped.

How dull was it? While watching this movie, I also:

  • made an omelet, sausage, and toast for dinner
  • scrubbed pots
  • emptied the dishwasher
  • refilled the dishwashser
  • paid my cell phone bill
  • watered the plants
  • played with the cats
  • flossed
  • did a load of laundry
  • composed this blog entry

At first I was offended that a movie by one of my favorite directors went straight to video, but by the time this one was halfway over, I could see why it bypassed theaters. I was so disappointed, I didn't even watch the special DVD features. Sigh. Maybe Guest has simply used up his allotment of wackiness for this lifetime.

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Tuesday, January 02, 2007

two more

Two movies I forgot to include in yesterday's master list:

  1. Save the Last Dance 2 — A Julliard ballerina must choose between living up to others' expectations and dancing to her own beat
  2. Miss Congeniality 2 — An FBI agent-cum-beauty queen uses her charms to nab bad guys and boost self-esteem

In both cases, these sequels were enjoyable, but the originals were better.

It's only 9:00 a.m.! Anybody for a kung fu movie before lunch?

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Sunday, November 19, 2006

a sense of Sunday

There are some people I'd like to e-mail today, but the Hotmail server is playing hard to get. I may have to break down and pick up the phone.

Tonight I see BNL live. WOO! Apparently I'm getting a free seat upgrade, too, from up in the nosebleeds to down on the floor. Double WOO! Not sure how I scored that, but I suspect moving my single behind was an easy way to fill in a one-seat gap. Let's hear it for flying solo!

I saw Casino Royale, the new James Bond movie, on Friday. Doube-OMG! BEST! BOND! EVER!!

Daniel Craig's Bond seems to be more brawn than brains. He sweats. He bleeds. He lusts, loves, loses. He's befuddled by the idea of a tailored tuxedo. He screws up monumentally, not just once but several times. He does not care how you prepare his martini.

This particular chapter in the saga shows us Bond as a newly promoted 00 agent, still very rough around the edges and not yet grown into the suave, sardonic groove Sean Connery and Pierce Brosnan typify. Craig's Bond is very physical, almost animal, from the dirty grace of his running and fighting to his feral growls under duress. No need to guess what kind of shape he's in, either; the camera takes ample advantage of his sculpted physique, from the swimming scenes to a nude one. (Need more emphasis on physicality? One scene even takes place in a Body Works exhibit.)

Bond's boss M refers to him as a blunt instrument early on. But watching his transformation from diamond in the rough to sparkling jewel in Her Majesty's crown is more like watching a sword being forged: he's folded in upon himself and pounded mercilessly until there's nothing left but keen sharpness. And there's no doubt that he's a weapon in M's hands.

Now that we've seen where James Bond comes from, I really want to see where he's going next.

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Monday, November 06, 2006

The Prestige is the shiznit

The Prestige is the shiznit. How intricate and mind-blowing is it? Hugh Jackman’s bare torso is the least of the things that will make you go, “Ooh!” This movie has it all: twists, layers, deceptions, obsessions, and David freakin’ Bowie as Nikola Tesla. There are easily half a dozen mad geniuses in this story, and the ending — the ending! — well, it’s magic, and to give it away would be a crime.

The magic is almost incidental to this story; character is the heart of it. In fact, the secrets behind the key illusions are given away freely, carelessly, onscreen. They’re trifles dwarfed by the secrets of human hearts and minds.

I knew and worked with a magician at one time, and while he was quite the crowd pleaser, he was also as full of emotional sleights and disappearances as the magicians in the movie. That’s one of many things this film gets spot-on.

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