What's the opposite of gold?

This afternoon I went to nbcolympics.com to try to watch the Olympic opening ceremonies online. But I'm not allowed to. Why? Because I don't have cable, evidently.

From what I can gather, NBC has partnered with numerous cable companies to provide online video. You have to subscribe to one of their partner services in order to access the video.

Uh, one of the main reasons I'm trying to watch online is because I don't have cable.

Verdict: STUPID!! FOR THE WIN!!!!

So I went to plain old nbc.com and tried to download a track & field video. But I'm not allowed to. Why? Because my computer is not running Windows.

Verdict: STUPID!! FOR THE WIN!!!!

Stupid: 2
Kim: 0

I finally found a scrap of the opening ceremonies on YouTube — 3.5 whole minutes' worth.
So far these Olympics are not going well.

the pits

With warmer weather approaching, I thought now would be a good time to upgrade my antiperspirant/deodorant. On the advice of several friends and a convincing commercial, I purchased Gillette's "clinical strength" product. And . . .

IT SUCKS! The "antiperspirant" did not even survive a single round of T'ai Chi; I was damp by the end of the second section of the form. Nor has it survived half a morning of sitting quietly at a computer. It's keeping my underarms about as dry as a garden hose would. The only good thing I can say about it is that I don't stink (yet).

Verdict: Don't waste your money.

aaaand they're off

9:59 a.m.: first drunk-dial wrong number of this snowy St. Patrick's Day.

packing it in

OK, how ridiculous is this?

The top photo shows the abundance of packaging in which I received a gift yesterday.

• At the top of the frame is the outer box, which was about 2 ft x 3 ft x 1 ft.
  
• To the left is the red gift box that was inside the outer box, about 1.5 ft x 1.5 ft x .75 ft.
  
• To the right of that, obscured by pink tissue paper, is the innermost box, which was inside the gift box. It measures about 1 ft x 1 ft x .5 ft.

The bottom photo shows all the packaging plus the gift that was inside. Can you spot it? It's a small silver jewelry rack, perfect for hanging dangly earrings from the cross-posts.

I like it a lot (Thanks, Mom!), but I don't see the reason for all the dead-tree cushioning. The rack is in no way delicate. It's made of metal, for heck's sake! What's the deal?

don't hate me because I'm beautiful

This morning I wore these keen red shoes to work at the U to go with my holiday-esque red velvet jacket. I really like these shoes, and they've received many favorable comments from others.

The first person I encountered when I arrived was M, who noticed the shoes immediately. "Oh, wow, check out your red shoes! And they match your jacket," M said. I smiled, thinking I was receiving a compliment. But then she continued, "That's kind of sickening. I hate it when people are so coordinated."

ZzzzzrrrrppWHAT?!

WHY do women say things like this to one another? Why? This remark ranks right up there with the time someone called me a snot because, when she paid me a compliment, I said thank you — instead of falling all over myself to protest that I was unworthy, apparently.

WHY is it so abhorrent to women that one of us should look nice or feel good about herself? When are we going to figure out that we are not diminished by others' OKness?

I told the sickened M not to barf on my good red shoes and scurried away with my tea, feeling a little sick myself. It was not a great way to start the day.

My holiday challenge to you is twofold:
1. Say nice things to people.
2. If people say nice things to you, thank them.

It's not that hard. Really. In fact, it feels kind of good.

weasels!

What the hell is the matter with people? What makes people think it's in any way acceptable to say, "Yes, I'll do that thing," and then not only not do it, but not even bother responding to queries about it?

Specifically, I'm talking about some of the asshats I've been dealing with from Freecycle.org. Freecycle is an online message board where you post ads for things you're wiling to give away — recycle for free — and others read the ads and respond to say they want your items. Then they come get the stuff . . . in theory.

Since finding out about Freecycle about a week ago, I've offered up seven items. All but one was spoken for immediately . . . and only two have actually been picked up, despite the responders' alleged enthusiasm. I've had to re-list most of them and kick a couple to the curb because I want them gone that badly. All the re-lists have been spoken for, but I have no faith they'll actually be picked up.

Because people, apparently, are weasels.

This makes me angry, of course, since the asshats are jerking my chain and wasting my time. But mostly it makes me sad. Freecycle is supposed to be a community of people who want to keep stuff out of landfills. It's a laudable goal, and everyone involved stands to get something they want for free. And I thought I'd court a little good karma by giving away some nice items rather than trying to profit from them.

Yet people just can't be bothered to keep their word about something as simple as collecting a bargain.

I try to give people the benefit of the doubt. I even try to set a good example by being a woman of my word. But what's the point when I'm the only one who cares, or even notices? Seriously. Someone explain this to me.